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Way back during my teenage years, before the days of the internet, I was living in San Juan, Puerto Rico without any ahem,”resources.” Thank god for those sexy International Male catalogs! I found much salvation and pleasure from looking at those gorgeous hunks wearing next to nothing in the catalogs. Between the catalog and the sexy hour-long infomercials featuring muscular, scantily clad athletes for Soloflex workout machines I was a happy camper.
The catalogs were addressed to my dad, who at the time had an American Express credit card and was considered “classy” enough to receive the catalog. If they only knew he had a gay son who infiltrated the catalog and snuck it out of the pile of family mail.
International Male is still going strong and has tons of extreme fashion and hunky men gracing the pages of their catalog and their website. I can’t think of a better Christmas present than some of those tacky suits, underwear or “accessories.” Do the models come with the clothing?
Listen to Sal-E, Marc Felion and me, Fausto Fernós on todays show as we talk about the jerks Sal-E has to contend with working as a nightclub entertainer and door greeter. You know the type. They get a couple of drinks in them and suddently they are the masters of the universe and want to get into everyones business. People, this holiday season, don’t drink and fight in bars! Poor Sal-E is tired of macing your sloppy selves.
You’re a mean one, Mister Grinch!
Some jerk in Canada has ruined Christmas for all the kiddies. Canadian police and the postal authorities are on the hunt for a “rouge elf” who’s been sending out nasty letters to children as part of Canada’s popular “Write to Santa” program. The program which gathers over 11,000 volunteers and postal employees to write back handwritten letters to children as Santa has got a bad egg in the ranks. What he’s actually saying is anyone’s guess. I take it the cops don’t want any copycat crimes.
So what did the authorities do? They stopped the program. This guy (or gal) has ruined it for everyone. Still, you have to admit it does sound pretty funny. I’m pretty curious to see what’s in those “evil santa” letters, aren’t you?
Don’t get mad at us for finding the “Evil Santa” story funny. And if I get a lump of coal, I know it won’t bother me at all… I don’t care what I get for Christmas, as long as it’s hard and hot!
Okay that’s actually song lyrics from my latest entry in the Gay Bloggies Challenge, which features me singing a deliciously tacky medley of Pointer Sisters, Blondie and Christmas songs. Plus, you get to see me suck a candy cane. Go check it out, give me the thumbs up and post a comment. Please don’t post any comments (positive or negative) on the other competitors entries. If you have something to say about the competition, post your comments about their entries in mine.
As you may know, comments encourage traffic (and votes) to their entries and lower my chances of winning this competition. If I win the competition, Marc will sit on a cake dressed up as Santa Claus AND he’ll reveal the celebrity he made cry when he had his picture taken with them.
I’ve read on the other competitors blogs that if you give them the thumbs down, (here and here) it’s like giving me two more votes!
Get this party started quickly with nitroglycerine, download the Feast of Fools.
Featured Music:
• Lynn Julian aka Cookie Cutter Girl - I Tricked Nick: iTunes | Amazon | CD Baby | Site
• Lee Harris & The Tijuana Trumpets - A Whole Lotta Santa - Greensleeves:Podsafe Music Network
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patchouli_stink says:
December 18, 2007 at 05:16Yeah International Male is hawt. I like the high rise running shorts http://www.internationalmale.com/product.asp?product=RW59LBAzz&dept%5Fid=10480&An=101&A=&Au=RollupKey