FOF #682 - That Almost Killed Me - 01.14.08

By Marc Felion on January 14, 2008 | Share & Save | Link | Print |

 
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Amanda and AdamWe have a big bucket of dumb on today’s show.

Join us as we discuss the recipients of the Darwin Awards 2007, which commemorate those who improve the human gene pool by accidentally removing themselves from it. It is a salute to stupid, or at least the unfortunate.

Huffing the oxygenAs you look over these stories of woeful calamity, you can’t seem to help notice that there are several trends happening here- drunken mishaps, electrocution, playing with fire/explosives, salvaging support structures and sex in odd places.

It’s easy to laugh at the tragic misfortunes of others, but let’s face it, there have been times in our own lives that we’ve made a mistake and put ourselves in the face of danger. How close have you come to making to the Darwin Awards? Please let us know.

On this show, we also invited you our listeners to join in on the fun and share their stories as we tried to answer the question “What is something stupid you’ve done that almost got you killed?”

Join Amanda Steinstein, Adam Guerino, Marc Felion and me Fausto Fernós as we talk about the sexy couple that succumbed to the power of the pyramid, the guy who bought the farm by tearing down the barn, teenagers who give a whole new meaning to the term “flash-dance” and the man who mistook bears for beer.

Join us next Sunday January 20, 7pm central for our next call in show. We’ll be announcing the guest and theme on Friday. Check the website for details.

If you live in Chicago, check out Adam Guerino’s upcoming shows:
January 21, 2008 - 8:30P Kitty Moon at 6237 N Clark
February 2 and February 16 at Edge Comedy Club at 777 N. Green Street
More info at myspace.com/adamguerino

The gay podcast that puts the smart in stupid- Feast of Fools.

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haven’t heard the show yet, but marc that mustache just reminds me of a Dirty Sanchez so much. and im not talking about the group.

Hey hey, I think his mustache looks really cute, like a gay cop.

This show went MUCH more smoothly… everyone sounded great and it flowed beautifully! Some of those stories were pretty crazy and I really enjoyed hearing from all the callers!

I guess the closest I ever came to a Darwinesque moment was about 15 years ago or so when I was still living at home in Kenosha. I was coming home from the bars in Chicago late at night and I-94 was pretty clear of traffic. So I was just cruising along as I crossed the state line into Kenosha, minding my own business, when all of a sudden I could see tail lights approaching me at BREAKNECK speed. They weren’t attached to car or a truck.. they were attached to a relatively small motorcycle; and it and its driver were stopped dead in the MIDDLE OF THE FRICKIN’ INTERSTATE, in my lane.

I had to be going at least 65-70MPH when I realized what it was. I hit the brakes hard and swerved, spun around at least 4 times, and somehow, by the grace of whatever I neither hit the idiot, nor did I flip my car over. I ended up facing the opposite direction, where I could still see the asshole parked in the middle of the fucking street. After I composed myself and took a couple deep breaths, I turned myself around and kept on driving.

Thankfully, like I said, there was next to NO traffic on the highway at the time. If there had been, there would have been a major pileup and I surely could have been crushed by something or other.

I wonder what the hell his problem was, anyway?

I love hearing Amanda. Dear please be careful when fishing potholders out from behind the stove. I’ll making you a new pot holder and send it to you next time that happens.
Okay now for my Darwinian moment.
I was a teenager living in rural south Georgia. I had washed my car that morning and had put Rain-X on my windshield. That night I was driving several towns over to visit a friend. So I was driving on a dark deserted country road when it started storming. I was amazed at how the rain was just beading off the windshield. I didn’t even have to turn on the windshield wipers. So I was just starring at the rain beading off and didn’t notice the turn in the road. I drove right off the road and into a ditch. Thank God there wasn’t a tree or fence there or I would have won a Darwin Award that day. Teenagers can be so stupid.

I lost the mustache. We did a photo shoot and I slowly shaved it all off. First it was a beard, then goatee, then mustache, and then nothing at all!

I thought the show was much better done this time around. Way to find your groove!

Cliff: I had a car-related almost death too involving a bend in the road… But it was because I was stupid and racing my Camry against a friends Aerostar. There was a fence, but I managed to go through a hole some previous dumbass had made.

I don’t even get the benefit of being distracted by pretty rainX phenomena.

Marc I must agree the ‘Stache looks very nice I am torn between whether or not it looks like a cop or The construction worker from that 70’s group Village people! :-) My really stupid near death experience happened a long time ago in a city far far away, here in Mass called Cambridge, I was about 5 or 6 years old and I was wondering one day how is it that babies get down the stairs in their walkers????? So me like a dumb ass put my self in a babies walker (very tight fit) and go down a flight of stairs in a babies walker.

OH and One more little story, My grandfather on my mother’s side of the family, had a little ranch in New Hampshire when I was growing up where he housed some horses. Well, my Aunt Betty told me to stay in the barn while she brings the horses out so we can ride them. Well, me again, like a dumb ass decide I am gonna jump up a fully grown horse at the age of 3 and a half like the Lone ranger or some dude from the Wild Wild West. I came running out of the barn and began my jump when the horse’s hind leg caught my face and threw me high in the sky. I guess the doctor was correct when he told my mother that I was a bouncing baby boy when I was born because I remember that when I came back down I did just that-Bounced!!!

Great Show Guys!! Luv ya and see you soon!!

Amanda, you cracked me up with the “Dyslexics of the world untie” line.

This call in show went a LOT better than the first, without the delay its ease to listen to!

Screening the calls still would be a little more helpful though.

I guess my Darwin-ism was almost zapping myself a few times with a charged capacitor in a monitor I was repairing (that’s about 400V). Luckily I had a plastic handled screw driver so when it shorted the capacitor it only melted the handle instead of my hand!

Also, Marc, I’ve had to ask for ID too, sadly, I had a bit of a twink phase, until I found out the guy I took home I found out was 17 when I was 21.

No cake shall be left unsat until Marc brings the beard back!

What’s all the fuss about the beard? I saw Marc last night and he was as smooth as a baby’s bottom! (All over.)

During the X-Mas holidays Marc grew out a prickly beard that looked great but was hard on my lips! He just shaved it off this Saturday, but managed to take some great looking pictures with our friend Solitaire.
Marc and Fausto at Mary's Attic
Here’s a pic of the photo shoot:
Marc Felion wearing a fabulous boa

Thanks, Gary! Wish I could take credit for it but I learned it back in high school.

I agree it would be great if we could screen calls, but none of these online call-in thingies allow for that. Best we can do is hope our callers have something interesting to say, or at least an entertaining way to say nothing.

The format really WORKED this time! Hilarious!

I think part of the fun is the fact NOBODY knows whats coming next. So we’re all on our toes waiting for the next caller to STRIKE.

We’ll continue doing these Sunday call in shows if the public response from it is strong. Otherwise, this is just a fun thing to try out that we may not necessarily continue doing.

I’m glad you guys got the “call in” to work! The “call in” idea is so great! Also as an evolutionary biologist I was extremely happy to hear you talk about the subject of animals, homosexuality, and evolution! It was great! I could talk about why homosexuality evolved and how it can be a positive and favorable character in a population of animals for hours. Keep up the good work guys. Oh and I am happy to hear Amanda’s voice again! :D

Aw! I can’t be around on Sunday nights for a while. :( Oh well, you know I’ll be listening to the results though! :-)

Yup this one really worked. Regarding facial hair: I just realised that nobody in Amsterdam has JUST the moustache anymore. There is always a beard or at least some stubble to go with it. There is a ’shaved head and chinfuzz’ movement that I am apparently part of - the new clone?
I don’t have any almost accidentally offing myself stories, except for going flat on my face on my bike a couple of times because of either being run into by a drunk, overloaded with groceries or getting the wheel caught in a parallel groove laid out for the tram. And I did almost break my neck once, nearly falling off the roof of my parent’s garage. Closest I came to actual extinction was getting close to a coma as a little kid because of an injection I was allergic to, but that was inflicted by others.
Loved Amanda and Adam! The wit, warmth and wisdom of Amanda always make me wish she was a neighbour and the dry sense of humour, sexy voice and furry arms of Adam make me wish I could lay down that stand-up comedian!

I love the face hair Marc! Makes you look like a bad boy- just my type!

Hey guys. I almost had a Darwin moment today while listening to this show. My co-worker was looking for a place to plug in her cell phone, but her powerstrip was full. We have lights under the cabinets hanging over our desks. I was thinking, you know, there are sometimes outlets on those lights, so I started to run my hand around the lights to see if there was an outlet. Luckily, I had been listening because I remembered that I had just put on hand lotion just before looking. I told my co-worker about the podcast and we both laughed.

As always, loved the show. Love you all and I hope to hear from Amanda again soon (: Oh, also, @Adam, Small town Iowa gravel roads are fun, aren’t they (: Luckily, I never had a farmer come after w/ a shotgun.

I loved to hear Amanda, We need more of her…. But not on or around April fools

I hear she’s getting cancer for April.

That’s so sad! Can I have her things?

Where the hell has Amanda been these few months? I love when she’s on!!!

I would love to hear an entire show about animals, homosexuality and evolution. It’s a very interesting subject and considering Jake Snow is an evolutionary biologist I think he would make for a great guest.

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About The Author: Marc Felion

Originally from Erie, Pennsylvania, Marc Felion works as a bartender. As co-host and producer of the Feast of Fools podcast, he helped launch one of the most successful podcasts in the world. He lives in Andersonville with his partner and co-host Fausto Fernós. he loves to watch sci-fi tv shows, read murder mysteries and fix cocktails.
View all entries by Marc Felion

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