FOF #750 - Transgender Menace - 04.30.08

By Fausto Fernós on April 30, 2008 | Share & Save | Link | Print |

 
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Sometimes you just wanna be a big baby - Tracy TylerI am a woman, ok? Tracy is in a bit of a quandry. Our modern day suburban tranny Tracy Tyler is in a bit of a stick since she got cast as a man in a local production of the musical Sweeney Todd, the Demon Barber of Fleet Street.

Since Tracy has spent the past couple of years working hard to unveil the woman inside herself, being cast as a man in a musical challenges her gender identity, as well as her identity as an actor. What will Tracy do an how will she pull off this Victor/Victoria and then Victor again story?

She’s isn’t the only one playing around with gender. Isabella Rossellini has become a transpecies porn star in a series of short films about the sex lives of bugs, insects, and various creatures. Each episode begins with Isabella speaking to the camera “ If I were a…(firefly, spider, dragonfly etc.).” She then dons a male costume of that species and explains how the species does “it.” Birds do it, bees do it, let’s fall in love.

So after CNN interviewed the three tools wearing the Abercrombie & Fitch t-shirts to confirm that the Bama isn’t taking advertisers, the general public (including me) have come out with their own “Obamacrombie” and “Hillister” t-shirts. Who will win this fashion election?

Obamacrombie - Vote for Obama T-Shirt OR Hillister - Hillary Clinton T-Shirt

Bikini season is just around the corner and Tracy is wondering if she will sport a bikini or will she cover it up like that incident in Katmandu, or was that Kalamazoo? Maybe it was in Kankakee or in Kenosha? We’re just glad it wasn’t in Cucamonga.

Plus tips on tipping the pizza delivery guy, how to get what you want from a hot sexy man. Stick around!

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Happy Birthday Tracy!

Hey there, guys!
Where is the link to download the show? And that little bar to to listen to the show on the site?
Kisses!

It’s there now!

This show did not download for me via RSS. Listening now through direct download.

Refresh your iTunes subscription!

I use the feedburner feed at
http://feeds.feedburner.com/FeastofFools

Hey Tracy love!!!! I wish I had heard this in the morning ’cause it would have brightened up my day so much. I love your stories and your crazy sexual adventures. Makes me remember the good ol’ days.. lol.

I hope you had a great birthday. I spent your birthday working ALL DAY LONG (and all night) - but when I saw you were on today’s show I made sure to listen as soon as I got home.

I saw Sweeney Todd on Tuesday night - the new Broadway in Chicago version - it was interesting. I can’t wait to see you belt out on stage! I bet it will be 10x better than what I saw.

See you soon love! :)

Tracy, just when I thought I’d heard it all, you continue to shock me, you minx! The pizza boy?! :-) Hoo girl, I think I’m going to be living my life vicariously through you! Thank you for entertaining prudes like me with your stories, and for showing that even the sweet faced girl next door can be a completely horny vixen underneath. I love it!!!!!

Also, I was glad to hear the hilarious skit at the beginning of the podcast– it’s been so long since you boys have done one!

More uptight British upper crust tranny ladies, please!

I loved this show,Its always great to hear from you TRACY ! Your laughter is addictive and those stories are awesome. Tracy, you need a show called Tranny Tales w/ Tracy Tyler.
I am glued when you start one of your stories, I’m thinking, oh lord what has she done now..

Thanks Rick, Rhea and Flmustang yeah I will agree with you guys I sometimes seem to be a magnet for strange situations. I guess I’ve always just been really uninhibited and I always make sure to talk to the kind of people that your mother told you to stay away from. I’ve always thought why stay away from them that’s what makes for a fun evening usually LOL LOL LOL

Yeah I totally would do a show called Tranny Tales—- would I get to sing in it??? I used to have a lot of fun singing in my cabaret show and talking about strange things that happened to me.

SMOOCH
-Tracy

Great show! Tracy you are hillarious : ) You shoud be on FOF more often.

Every guest on this show should use the Feast of Fools as a stepping stone to have their own podcast so I don’t have to listen to them on this one. ;)

Well that is a great compliment. They do pick very creative, everyday, awesome people to be on the show. Not to give anyone ideas about leaving. I can just imagine Tracy having her own call in show, giving people advice, similar theme to Carrie on Sex and the City.

Thanks for the advice TrannyLover but I would never be able to do as good of a show as Marc and Fausto and at this point I wouldn’t want to be one of those that puts out a poor quality show only rambling on and on just to hear myself talk and clutter up the internet. Although I do listen to the several transgendered themed podcasts out there and I have to hand it to them they are entertaining and they should be very proud of what they are doing for the transgendered community.

Fantastic show! I love TRACY!! She always has the more scandalous and hysterical stories to tell. Congratulations on your part in Sweeney Todd! Who cares if you have to play a man; isn’t playing a character unlike yourself the nature of acting?

And let me clear something up about the boys wearing Abercrombie and Fitch. Anyone who has to wear a brand that plasters its brand name on a t-shirt in 1000 point font is pathetic. I hate Abercrombie and Fitch and Hollister so much! I have never and will never buy anything from those stores as long as they produce such ridiculous and desperate clothes.

yeah what ever happened to clothes just being clothes???? It’s funny because Abercrombie and Fitch in the late 80s and early 90s like everyone else at the time went through what the retail world called as “Branding” their private label merchandise — making it look like it’s a designer label by plastering their name all over it as if someone would be proud to wear something made in a sweat shop in China that in reality didn’t have much design go into it in the first place. Where as most designers have moved away from those large obnoxious labels like Tommy Hilfiger, Ralph Lauren Polo, Nautica, Calvin Klein, even Gucci and YSL Abercrombie and Fitch still stand by their design esthetic and fallowers like American Eagle and Gap just continue copy. Although there is nothing like a nice comfy varsity inspired draw sting short and thick snuggely varsity sweatshirt to kick around in on a rainy spring day.

Oh Tracy you are so humble! Really, you should leave this podcast forever and start your own.

You are too big of a star to have to share the spotlight with anyone but yourself.

Actually, FLMUSTANG why don’t you produce it for her?

I love it when Tracy is on… with time differences, it’s the only way we can catch up! LOL. I remember the Glen story, but somehow I missed the salesman story back then. Tracy will have to tell that one next time she’s on FoF. I remember Tracy in “Sweeney Todd” way back when, and she was fabulous, so I know she’ll be great! Don’t worry about playing a man, Tracy–it’s just a part and you’ll do well!

LOL HEY ARTHUR! — Thanks for calling me from New Zealand on my birthday — that was so sweet.

For everyone out there that is reading this — Arthur was the “roommate” that was usually home when the pizza guy came —– and for the record , I didn’t really intend on seducing him that time and like I said nothing happened .in some strange way I just wanted him to want me. LOL — LOL those were crazy times !

SMOOCH Arthur — hope all is well down there in new Zealand

-Tracy

LOL LOL — me a star????? ummmmmm I don’t think so — maybe if there were poperatzi waiting outside my front door and people asking me for my autograph but I can’t even get a decent date LOL —-

who are you TrannieLover /TrannyLover ???? Why are you posting annomously — do we know each other???

tracy you are crazy baby. love you!

let’s party again soon ;-)

-teddy

Hope you had a great birthday party, Tracy !

Try not to eat at McD always in the morning. It may help to loose some kilo. ;)

I always appreciate Tracy’s tips on picking up pizza boys. She’s a fount of wisdom, that one….

Tracy!!!!! Simply gorgeous. Who knew a few short months ago that a new bright shiny star was on the Feast of Fools horizon. Tracy you r without a doubt the best thing that’s happened to the show this year. The pizza boy stories are treasures.

I do have a diet tip. The South Beach Diet not only works, but is actually very sensible and is easy to incorporate into actual daily living. I went on it a few years back for a period of two months leading up to a cruise (I had to get into speedo shape) and easily lost the weight I was looking to lose. I even visited a dietitian last year as part of my initial visits with a new HMO and the “normal healthy diet” she unrecommended just for everyday living was essentially everything I learned on the South Beach Diet, that for the most part had just become my general eating habits after the diet.

There’s an initial period of two weeks that is tough - it’s a kind of sugar/carb detox period, but after that two weeks the diet becomes about a well rounded healthy food approach emphasizing reasonable portions, fresh vegetables, reduced intake of processed sugars, selecting carbs that are coupled with high fiber content (like using whole grain breads and pastas), lean proteins, and avoiding food preparation that diminishes the health benefits of food (like deep frying).

It does take a bit of readjustment when we have a lifetime of bad eating habits that we view as comfortable and that we enjoy, but it was actually a diet that made so much sense, was completely doable, and was just easy to incorporate into how I viewed and made food choices after the period when I wasn’t “on the diet” for the brief weight loss period I was after. The hardest part for me was desserts and baked goods, but there are practical solutions in the plan, and it changed the way I approach food forever.

Also You must exercise. It’s critical to general health and for weight loss and fitness a food only approach is only going to have limited impact without some increase in your physical activity and weekly exercise.

It can be daunting, but you are such an amazing strong force of nature, I don’t believe that there’s any challenge in life that you can’t tackle.

You Go Girl!!!!!!!

NO DEEP FRYING?????????????????????????? I can’t live like that :-( …………. That is cruel to ask me not to deep fry :-(

Well if I could have a waist line like yours Curtis then I should probally give it a shot — you look awesome honey!! I thought you were one of those ” I can eat anything and never gain weight ” kind of girls LOL LOL — hehehehehe

Thanks for the advice! —— I’ve been working out in my new gym at my complex and I’ve found a new game to play —– it’s soo fun ! When I’m on the tread mill or doing sit ups or leg lifts I grunt like I’m having sex — YOU SHOULD SEE THE BOYS FACES WHEN I DO LOL LOL LOL —- once in a while a really cute one comes over and works out next to me LOL LOL — then I really pour it on —- I do everything short of say — harder harder , fuck me deeper big daddy LOL LOL —- it’s so fun !!!!

SMOOCH

-Tracy

I haven’t had anything deep fried in weeks now. I’ve even started to poaching my eggs instead of having them sunny side up.
Now, if I can just quit the sweets!

Aww, Happy Birthday Tracy from Bonnie Scotland! What did you think of the new BBC show, ‘Mrs In-Betweeny’ I sent on disc? The final scene was reminiscent of ‘Transamerica’ I thought.
As for diets, I’ve been on one since I was about 8!

I don’t think I’ve given it to her yet. Now I’m going to have to look for it.

The sweets are so hard to give up. That has been one of my big killers. I just try to manage my intake. I don’t keep bowls of candy at my desk at work like I once did. I don’t keep a stock of cookies at home to snack on constantly anymore. I do still eat chocolate and cookies and such, just not the quantity I once did. I also learned how to supplement my sweet tooth needs with things that I genuinely enjoy like Sugar free jello pudding, fresh fruit (berries are in season in California and I’m having yummy bowls of strawberries and black berries instead of the old ice cream and cookies fix), and even some hard candy made with splenda (the Wurther’s Originals in sugar free are particularly good). I find that sugar free chocolate candy is pretty bad unless there’s mint in it.

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About The Author: Fausto Fernós

Born in San Juan, Puerto Rico, Fausto Fernós created the Feast of Fools in 1998 as wacky artists variety show in Chicago, Illinois. Along with his partner Marc Felion, he hosts the world's most downloaded talk show for gay people on the internet, Feast of Fools. Fausto loves pomegranates, waterfalls and 70s retro funk music.
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