I think the whole point of giving a compliment is to a way to form closer bonds with people, so here’s some ideas to think about when you’re wanting to pay a compliment to someone or find yourself receiving one.
GIVING A COMPLIMENT
• Think of it as a gift from your heart.
• Be sincere in your opinion.
Steps to take:
1- Find a specific quality you admire in the other person
2- Back it up with the reason WHY you think so.
3- Follow up with a question.
4- Listen.
• Don’t compare them to others in a positive or negative way. “You’re just like this other person.”
• Be sincere by being confident in your opinion.
• Ask for nothing in return. Don’t give a compliment if what you really want something back from it (like a favor) Ask for that instead.
RECEIVING A COMPLIMENT
1- Thank them, then stop. Don’t let anything negative come out of your mouth.
2- Think about the compliment.
3- Share with them how the compliment makes you feel.
• Do not dismiss their opinion. Many of us have been conditioned to dismiss compliments.
• Don’t transfer the credit. This is your chance to receive love.
• If you want to share credit, do so only after the feelings have been acknowledged.
A compliment is a great opportunity to form a closer bond between people and raise people’s confidence in themselves.
Here’s my attempt to pay our audience a no-strings-attached compliment:
I think you, our listeners, are great people. I really enjoy reading your responses on the website and in the community. Whenever we meet, we always have a great time and you never disappoint me when I need your support. I want you guys to know how much joy it is to me to be able to speak to such a colorful and wonderful set of people on a daily basis. What are your hopes and dreams?
Wesley says:
September 5, 2007 at 01:10Thank you, thank you! Um, I hope to one day create a sense of common family (or at least civility) in my housing co-ops. It’s a big job and I know I can’t do it alone. Your show gives me good points on how to approach social problems with the right attitude. And guys can show how to throw a really good party!